“Who’s that man?” My toddler asks this question as the orange, pouty face of America’s President looms on the news.
Never has there been a longer pause between an awkward question asked by my toddler and my answer – which I’m struggling to formulate.
The obvious answer of course is that he’s Donald Trump, the President of the United States.
But there’s so much more to explain though.
Despite the fact that he has been the most powerful individual in the world for 18 months, I think most of us are still in shock that he was even elected.
Journalists around the world watch his Twitter feed with bated breath, wondering when he’s going to fly off the handle next and give them something new to write about.
No one knows what he’s going to do next. That’s what makes him so scary. It should be absolutely hilarious that he – the leader of the free world – takes to Twitter because he doesn’t like an impression he’s seen of himself on television.
But it isn’t, because it’s so bloody ridiculous that a man who should rise above petty arguments, be the voice of reason, can become so outraged over such trivial matters.
So, how on earth do we begin to explain him to a toddler?
His campaign and subsequent presidency has been built on the sort of entertaining and easily accessible language that appeals to three-year-olds.
Single words, catchphrases, colourful tweets simplifying the most complex of diplomatic situations into a single and utterly selfish summary.
Booya! Fake News! America First!
Who can forget his promises to build the wall on the border with Mexico. His chants to the crowds during his campaign.
Trump: What are we going to do?
Crowd: Build a wall!
Trump: Who’s going to pay for it?
If the subject matter weren’t so serious and utterly depressing, you could almost compare it to an entertainer at a child’s birthday party, who knows exactly what the kids want and gives it to them in spades.
I suppose the easiest way to explain the concept of Donald Trump to a young child is to compare him to their favourite bouncy ball. Because no matter how hard he falls, he always bounces right back up.
Trump is like the human embodiment of Teflon. Because nothing ever sticks.
He has been caught on tape explaining how he thinks it’s acceptable to grab women by the pussy.
He has tried to ban visitors from several Muslim countries from visiting his country. Children were separated from their parents at the Mexican border due to his zero tolerance policy on illegal immigration.
There are reports of affairs committed while married to the First Lady – Melania. One stripper says she was paid to stay silent about her fling with the President.
The suspicions surrounding the Russians involvement in manipulating the American election continue, and the inquiry is ongoing. How much the Trump camp was involved in this is still under a huge question mark.
If Obama had been hit by any ONE of these scandals, would his presidency have survived? I doubt it. His presidency was built on foundations of honesty, integrity and maturity.
Trump has built his on being able to speak to and be understood by the average American Joe.
People who have felt they are ignored and looked down upon by the Washington elite feel like Trump is on their side.
The Trump phenomenon is one that will be written about and talked about for decades to come, because none of us can really make sense of how a man-child is still managing to blag his way through the top job.
How then can I begin to explain, who is that man, to my toddler?
Trump is so utterly impossible to explain without launching into some form of hate-filled diatribe that when it comes to telling my toddler who he is, I’ll stick to just saying POTUS. Sad.