As mums it’s often easy to think we are all alone. That stupid guilt fairy likes to flutter in and make us feel inadequate, wrong and seriously lacking in the mama skills department.
We all suffer bad days and setbacks, but we often end up suffering through it by ourselves, because we don’t want to voice out loud all of the ways we think we are failing.
So these are 11 things all mums need to hear, help a fellow mama by saying one today!
1. You are enough
It could be that we were too tired to play today, or that we didn’t manage to breastfeed for the full gold standard 12months, if at all.
Whatever the reason, we all feel like we’ve fallen short at times and worry we aren’t the parent we had hoped we would be.
The truth is that you are enough, because you are you. Your kid would never swap you for the world.
2. Nobody is perfect
Despite what you might see on social media, are all screwing up in our own ways.
I’ve lost it and shouted at my kids when the noise has got too much. I’ve left them in front of the telly for hours so I can do something else. I’ve lied and said the swimming pool isn’t open today because I didn’t have the energy to take them.
None of us are perfect, so don’t believe first impressions or pretty pictures on Instagram.
3. Enjoying work isn’t a crime
If you’re doing something that makes you happy and puts food on the table, then that is nothing to be ashamed about. Your kids won’t be scarred for life from having a working parent as a role model.
4. Taking care of you is just as important
Happy mama, happy baby. Taking a little time for self-care is so important. Find something you love doing and find the time to do it regularly.
5. It’s OK to say no
Don’t feel under pressure to attend every local baby group or get involved with the nursery fun day. If it’s not your cup of tea, that doesn’t matter. You don’t have to join in to be a good parent.
6. There is no such thing as “right”
Everyone has an opinion or a tried and tested method of doing things. The truth is that as long as you feed your kids and keep them warm, you won’t be doing anything wrong.
7. It’s fine to stay in your PJs all day
Sometimes we just can’t make it out of the house. It could be because one child is ill or because you’ve been up all night.
Whatever the reason, spending the odd day at home with no other human interaction is totally fine.
8. We’ve all been there
You’re not as unique as you might think. The disastrous lunch out, the years at nursery drop-off, the worry about your kid making friends, the pain of sleep deprivation. We’ve all been through it at some point. Remember you’re not alone.
9. It’s cool if you lose your shit
We all freak out and lose it at some point. There’s only so much any person can watch Peppa Pig, while hearing “mummy” screamed for the 159th time and cleaning up half chewed food before they snap.
10. Leave the bad days behind you
Just let it go, let it go. We can’t change what’s happened, but we can have a glass of wine and try to relax.
11. You don’t have to love every minute of motherhood
At times we all think we would rather our kids were being looked after by someone else for a day, or seven. Enjoying every minute of motherhood is not only unrealistic, but thinking we should puts so much pressure on your already overloaded shoulders.
Parenting is hard, fact. If you need to swear under your breath and long for bedtime to arrive, that is totally normal.