This weekend will mark my third Mother’s Day as a mummy myself. A day when I will be receiving thanks from my family for all that I do.
While it’s lovely to be thanked on Mother’s Day and be spoilt a bit, it’s not why we got into this motherhood business.
After all, if you did get into mothering expecting it to be full of rewards and thank-yous, then you’re probably feeling mighty disappointed right now.
Having children is not about getting a card, some flowers, and maybe even some chocolates, one day a year. It’s about being there every single day for the fun times and absolutely rubbish, wish you could just walk away from it all, c**P times.
Because that is what makes a mum a good mum. We don’t give up.
Sure, we might say we are giving up at times, we might tell our kids to just cook their own dinner when they’re complaining about what’s on the menu and we might curse under our breath as we lift our screaming baby out of their crib for the fifth time in less than an hour. But do we walk away? No.
Parenting can often feel like you’re peddling uphill on a treadmill – you’re getting nowhere and it’s exceptionally exhausting.
When I became a mum it was something that I knew I wanted. We had planned to start a family and I was excited throughout my pregnancy, no matter how nauseous and devoid of energy it made me feel.
But once my baby arrived the reality hit. I didn’t have any clue what being a mum actually meant. And no-one can explain it to you, it’s just something you have to find out for yourself.
The sleepless nights, the worry, the feeling of always being behind with everything, that fear of getting it all “wrong” and the loss of identity that comes with pouring everything you have into raising a helpless tiny human being.
If your life is a snow globe, then pre-baby it was a calm and serene scene, and post-baby someone picked it up and shook the absolute f**k out of it. It changes everything, and it’s hard.
But, being a mum, having babies, is full of wonderful moments. There are some that simply take your breath away.
Holding your baby for the first time is one of those big life-changing events that sticks in your mind forever, and those night feeds, while unbelievably tiring, can also make your heart burst as your baby gazes at you while gripping your finger.
Being a mum to me is not a job, it’s part of who I am now. And it’s hard, frustrating, exhausting and utterly confusing, but I am so very glad to have my children.
So while I might be getting a thank-you from my kids this weekend, it’s not not something I need.
Because being their mummy is the biggest privilege of my life. I know that nothing, no gift, no card, no bar of chocolate, will ever, ever top it.
Being there to see them walk for the first time and having conversations with my toddler about her favourite things are moments that make my life so very special.
It’s lovely to be thanked and celebrated this weekend, but I will also be taking a little time to be thankful for the beautiful family that I have.
What are your feelings about Mother’s Day? What do you feel when you reflect back on the last year as a parent?
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