The 50 reasons I’m not sleeping

IMG_3263.JPGEvery night I do all I can to create a calm sleeping environment. This can quickly go downhill with two kids to keep in order. I agonise over the room temperature/bedding/clothes but some nights there is no winning.

Here are the top 50 reasons my toddler gives for not sleeping:

Too hot. Too cold. Cat went out the cat flap. Cat yowling in the garden. Hungry. Feeling sick. My nappy leaked. Bumped the headboard. Car alarm. Daddy sneezed. Volume suddenly shot up during dramatic shoot out in film mummy and daddy are watching downstairs. Neighbours having a row. Children kicking a ball outside.Owl. Boy racer next door has come home (vrooooooom). Washing machine is rattling. There’s a bee/mosquito/fly in my room. Want a drink of water. Want ice cream. Want more milk. Want a nursery rhyme. Want to go to the play park. Been sick. Need my back rubbed. Hair is in my eyes. I’ve taken my pyjamas off. Thunder is loud. My leg is stuck in the bars. Mummy’s electric toothbrush. The loo flushed. Want to know where the cat’s gone. Want calpol (early drug dependency alert!). Poked myself in the face. Need a poo. Rain is loud. Want the cuddly monkey in bed with me. Worried the cat might be hungry. Don’t like these pyjamas. Must watch episode of Peppa where George has a cold. Smoke alarm low battery alert went off (argh). Local politician just banged on the door. Wondering where the Gruffalo pyjamas are. Local boozer is holding a 90s themed karaoke night and (ear splitting) noise can be heard within a half mile radius. Grandparents gave me sweets and I want more. Got tangled up while trying to remove my pyjamas. Wind is loud
Need to read Spot Bakes a Cake for the 156th time today. Pulled my own hair. Want to sleep with mummy and daddy. My sister is crying. “It’s morning”, “no its sleepy time”, “No… morning”.

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